Feeling old today.

There's nothing like hearing about the death of a former classmate to make you feel old.

Typical Sunday for me - I was just scrolling through Facebook and reading favorite blogs on Bloglovin, when I saw a post on a friend's FB page. He's a friend who doesn't spend a lot of time there, so it's usually a pleasant surprise when there's a post.

Not so pleasant this time.

It was a post by his wife, logged into his account (and tagging herself so we would know it was her) telling us he had died in his sleep last night.

This man was MY AGE. We were class of 1988 - so 43-44 years old.
And he died in his sleep.

This was, as far as I knew, a fairly healthy man. He played hockey. He still played drums.
And now his wife of over 13 years is a young widow.

It does make me think about my own mortality. I'm his age. I'm not in excellent health.
Yes, it crosses my mind that someday my husband might have to log into my Facebook account and do the same thing.

Back when we were in school, death and middle age seemed so far off. Now, it is reality. We've lost so many of our classmates, so many of our friends, so many of our relatives.
The difference now is that we find out about these things on social media. No, this isn't the first time I've found out about a death via Facebook. It isn't even the 2nd. And yes, I've found out about relatives deaths via Facebook.

Maybe someone should invent Deathbook... then us old folks could go read it daily like previous generations used to read the obituaries in the newspaper (remember those, newspapers?).

Bah. Ramble over.

Time for dinner.

Whatever happened to...

I sometimes wonder whatever happened to some folks I went to school with. Mind you, I'm in my 40s now - so it has been quite a while - but I still wonder.

Most of my wondering though, is about if I even ever registered on their radar as a person who was ever there or ever important.

I was NOT one of the popular kids. I was poor. I dressed funny. I was very tall and "chunky". I didn't have in-style hair or clothes. I wasn't in on any of the popular activities.

I was pushed aside, ridiculed and bullied by the popular kids.

So was I remembered by any of these people?
Because I do remember them.

I have, on occasion, tried to "friend" some of these people on FB. Rarely will I even get a response. I wonder if it is because I'm still not one of the pretty and popular people, if they have even the slightest inkling of guilt about how they treated another person, or if I was just utterly forgettable.

I just sometimes wonder.